Last night we saw Big E Langston attack John Cena at the end of Raw. What is next for the most obtuse love triangle in the history of sports entertainment. Where does Langston fit in the diagram? The Big Show used a big chair to win on Sunday. Sheamus used the big chair to almost cost Show the title on Monday.
This week, we are live in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania and your announcers are Josh ?Maybe Miz and Del Rio should get Sidney Crosby to be their tag team partner? Mathews, Michael ?Sid Bream? Cole, and John ?Did you know that Alberto Del Rio comes from Mexico?s Most Famous Wrestling Family. . . and if you didn?t I will tell you five times tonight? Layfield.
We begin the show with MizTV and he is in the ring with his furniture. He welcomes everyone to his show. He has a special episode because there are no commercials. Miz says that his guests shocked the world on Sunday and did more damage than Lindsay Lohan and a moving vehicle. They could not explain their actions on Raw, but they will get the chance tonight.
Dolph Ziggler, AJ Lee, and Big E Langston make their way to the ring and we see some highlights.
Miz asks WHY?
AJ responds with some reallys. She tells Miz to bring John Cena on the show to ask how he toyed with her heart. Then this would make more sense. She lost her job on Raw because she wanted to keep John Cena?s good name clean. She thought it was worth it because ?this? happened. We see footage of their first kiss on Raw.
AJ says that won a Slammy Award. She thought it brought them closer together and the start of something where they would take it to the next level, but she was wrong. John Cena was playing with her heart and emotions. She wanted to shout their love from the rooftop and she even made gifts for John.
We see Vickie revealing some of the gifts she made for John.
AJ asks if Cena appreciated how much time it took to make those bows? Cena only cares about himself. She cared about him and she wanted to support him and ?this? is what he said about that. We see Cena refusing to allow AJ to be at ringside with him.
AJ says that Cena thought he was thinking about her safety, but she was being kept at arm?s length as their secret. He was supposed to be different than Daniel Bryan and CM Punk. She loved them and they used her. They threw her away like she was trash. Cena was supposed to be better than that.
John Cena broke her heart. That is why she helped Dolph Ziggler break John Cena.
Miz calls them America?s Sweetheart. Miz asks if Dolph is all aboard the ?crazy train?. Langston gets between AJ and Miz and Miz asks ?Who?.
AJ introduces Big E Langston. She says that he is a friend of hers and he does not like it when people use ?that word? around her.
Dolph calls Miz hilarious but completely clueless. AJ isn?t . . . he tells AJ ?earmuffs? . . . crazy, but she is passionate. When Big E came into this ring and crushed John Cena. He learned it earlier when AJ gave him one of the hottest kisses in the history of Raw.
Cena can win the Slammy for Superstar of the Year. He doesn?t need Slammys. At TLC, not only did he keep his Money in the Bank contract . . . when it comes to John Cena, he stole the show . . . and his girlfriend.
Miz says that he hopes that Dolph can please each of AJ?s personalities. Miz mentions Dolph?s choice in women. Miz goes through the list and calls Dolph the sixth member of One Direction.
Langston knocks down Miz with a body block and then Langston hits the Big Ending on Miz.
AJ tells Miz . . . show off and then she skips around Miz.
Booker is walking in the back and Teddy Long stops him and he says that he has someone who he thinks Booker should give a chance to. Teddy introduces Brad Maddox to Booker. Booker reminds Teddy that this is the guy who screwed Ryback at Hell in a Cell. Booker says that Brad is creepy. Teddy mentions his social media following and his YouTube show. Booker says that he does not trust Brad. Teddy says that Brad is hungry and looking for a contract. Teddy says that people deserve a second chance. Booker tells Teddy to let Brad know he will find out who his opponent is.
Match Number One: Damien Sandow (with Cody Rhodes) versus Sin Cara
Cara with an arm bar but Sandow pushes him away while Cara wonders where Rey is. Cara with kicks to Sandow and then Sandow avoids the handspring back elbow and goes to the floor. Sandow returns to the ring and he kicks Cara and tries to slam him but Cara gets to his feet. Cara with a double jump arm drag and a springboard drop kick.
Cara with an enzuigiri from the apron but Cody pulls Cara off the apron when the referee was checking on Sandow. Sandow gets a near fall and then he connects with forearms to the chest. Sandow stomps on the chest. Sandow with a suplex and he gets a near fall. Sandow with a reverse chin lock.
Sandow with a side Russian leg sweep and then he tries for the Elbow of Disdain but Cara moves. Cara with a sunset flip for a near fall but Sandow with a clothesline and elbow drop followed by punches. Sandow removes his elbow pad and connects with an elbow while Cara is over the apron. Sandow gets a near fall and then reapplies a reverse chin lock.
Cara with a jawbreaker to get out of the hold. Sandow misses a charge into the corner and then Cara kicks him and connects with forearms. Cara with a springboard back elbow and forearms to Sandow. Cara with a rana to Sandow. Cara with kicks but Sandow with an Irish whip. Cara with a cross body for a near fall. Cara with a drop kick and Sandow goes to the floor. Cody checks on Sandow and Cara with a suicide dive onto both men.
We see The Shield come to the ring and Reigns has Rey?s mask and he throws it to Cara. Sin Cara is confused and Sandow hits Terminus for the three count.
Winner: Damien Sandow
After the match, The Shield attack Cara. They hold Cara while Rollins goes off the turnbuckles with a knee drop to the injured leg.
The medical staff checks on Sin Cara while The Shield laugh at him.
Match Number Two:Santino Marella versus Tensai
Tensai wants to kill Santino but Santino hides behind the referee. Santino leaps for a side head lock but Tensai with a shoulder tackle. Santino fails to kip up and Tensai with punches. Santino power walks and then he tries to slam Tensai but he fails. Tensai with an elbow drop and then he punches Santino. Tensai with back fists to Santino.
Tensai with an Irish whip but Santino floats over and tries for a German suplex but Tensai does not budge. Santino tries for a slam but falls under Tensai?s weight and he gets a near fall. Tensai with a head butt and gets a near fall. Tensai works on the neck but Santino with punches and tries for a cross body but bounces off Tensai?s chest.
Tensai holds Santino away by the head while yelling at him. Santino with a kick but Tensai with an uppercut. Santino with punches and forearms. Santino with the split but Tensai blocks the hip toss. Santino with a slam and diving head butt. Santino pulls out his cobra and Tensai blocks it. Tensai with a sleeper and the Cobra tries to hit Tensai. Santino hits the cobra on the top of the head but it has no effect. Tensai with a punch but he misses the back senton and Santino gets the three count.
Winner: Santino Marella
We are told by Michael Cole that Sin Cara suffered serious knee damage as a result of what the Shield did to him. Josh wonders why the Shield attacked Sin Cara.
We go to footage from last night when the Shield confronted Ric Flair.
Kane, Daniel Bryan, and Kofi Kingston are in the locker room and he appreciates what Daniel and Kane did to The Shield. Kane tells Kofi to get eyes in the back of their heads because of what the Shield has done.
Kofi wants to get his hands on Wade Barrett during the match.
Daniel wants to know if Kofi LOLed more in Anger Management than when the Rock threw Cena?s merchandise in the river.
Kofi shows his Slammy and Bryan freaks out. Kane tells Bryan to calm down. Kofi lets out a wooo and that gets Daniel NO-ing.
We are told that Rey Mysterio was attacked by The Shield and Rey suffered a neck injury.
Match Number Three: Wade Barrett, Darren Young, and Titus O?Neil versus Daniel Bryan, Kane, and Kofi Kingston
Kofi and Titus start things off and Titus takes advantage of a Barrett distraction and he hits Kofi from behind. Kofi goes after Barrett on the floor and Titus pulls Kofi off Barrett and sends him to the floor. Young tags in and he punches and kicks Young. Kofi with a drop kick and Bryan tags in.
Bryan with a kick to the midsection and chest until the referee pulls him out of the corner. Bryan sets for a Mexican surfboard and he gets Young in the air and then he tags in Kane who hits a drop kick to a vulnerable Young and Kane gets a near fall. Kane with an elbow to the head and then he kicks Young in the corner.
Kane with an Irish whip and Bryan is tagged back in. Kane Irish whips Bryan into Young for a drop kick and Bryan gets a near fall. Bryan with kicks to Young. Young with a hot shot to Bryan and Darren tags in Barrett. Barrett with kicks to the head followed by an Irish whip. Barrett with punches in the corner and then he traps the arms in the ropes and punches him. Barrett with a knee.
Barrett with a reverse chin lock. Bryan with elbows to Barrett but Wade with a knee. Bryan avoids a suplex attempt and Kofi tags in and hits a springboard clothesline followed by chops and a drop kick. Kofi with a superman punch and then he hits the Boom Drop. Kofi sets up for Trouble in Paradise but Young distracts Kofi and Barrett with a clothesline that sends Kofi over the top rope to the floor.
Titus sends Kofi into the ringside barrier and he barks. Titus gets a near fall on Kofi. O?Neil with an abdominal stretch on Kofi. Kofi tries for an arm drag but Titus pulls Kofi up and we take a look up the aisle.
Young tags in and they hit a double shoulder tackle. Young with a belly-to-back suplex and he gets a near fall. Young with a reverse chin lock on Kofi but Kofi with punches. Young with a hard Irish whip. Young with a drop toe hold and he keeps Kofi from making the tag. Young with a knee to the back.
Barrett tags in and he connects with knees and a clothesline for a near fall. Young tags back in and he kicks Kofi in the ribs. Young puts Kofi on the turnbuckles and he punches Kofi to set up for a superplex. Kofi with punches and he hits a DDT.
Kane and Titus tag in and Kane with a shoulder tackle and back elbow followed by an uppercut. Kane with a clothesline into the corner and Titus misses a charge into the corner. Kane with a punch and a side slam for a near fall. Kane goes up top but Young tries to stop him. Kane with a punch to Young but he misses the clothesline and Titus hits Clash of the Titus but Bryan with a knee to break it up.
Barrett takes care of Bryan and then he connects with a back heel kick to Kofi and he sends Kofi into the ring post. Kane hits Barrett but Titus hits Kane from behind. Young tags in and they set for a double shoulder tackle from a three point stance but Bryan pulls Titus to the floor and Kane hits a choke slam on Young for the three count.
Winners: Kane, Daniel Bryan, and Kofi Kingston
We take a look back at Big E Langston?s debut against John Cena.
John Cena and Sheamus are in the locker room and Sheamus is telling a joke. Cena tells Sheamus to focus on tonight. Cena says that Big E Langston might be the strongest person in the WWE.
Sheamus says that he is looking forward to this fight with the biggest guys in the WWE. Sheamus asks Cena what is cracking with him and AJ. Cena whispers in Sheamus? ear and Sheamus cannot believe what he is hearing. Cena tells Sheamus that he is kidding.
CM Punk comes out on crutches and he is with Paul Heyman as we celebrate Day 394 of the Punk WWE Title Reign.
Punk says that it has been 394 days. The longest WWE Championship reign in the modern era. In twenty years, everyone, like Grey?s Sports Almanac and consider him as the greatest of all time. However, the mutants could not put their ignorance or bias aside and do the right thing and vote for him as Superstar of the Year.
Instead, the Slammys were turned into a sham of a popularity show and voted for John Cena. Winning and losing does not mean much to the WWE Universe. They must sign up their kids to play in T-Ball where there is no score being kept.
Not only should women not be allowed to vote, it is the men too. Punk says that he expects that sort of behavior from losers. That is the law of the jungle. In the world, there are winners . . . Paul Heyman and himself . . . and there are losers. He expected more from John Cena. You could see on Cena?s face that he knows that he was not the Superstar of the Year and that CM Punk was the better man.
Instead Cena does not hustle and show loyalty and respect. Punk says that Cena sucked up to a man he considers a legend. Cena gave Punk?s Slammy to Ric Flair. Punk tells the people of Pittsburgh to keep Woooing so the people can support the relics from the past who steal the spotlight from the young lions and ring generals. He wants these people to come back to pay their child support and alimony.
He asks the people what is more impressive than winning the title sixteen times in a ninety five year career. It is not losing in almost 400 days. Punk says that he does not lose. He has beaten John Cena and that knuckle dragging Ryback.
Punk says that he sets the Gold Standard. Two weeks after surgery, no one else would be in the ring. They would be at home popping pain pills. Punk says that no one else in Pittsburgh is entertaining them and those women known as the Pittsburgh Penguins are on strike. CM Punk does not go on strike and there is no offseason. He is the person you pay to see on television every week.
Punk says that he will be back next year with Paul Heyman holding the title over his head. No one will beat him. Not John Cena, not Ryback, not Ric Flair, not The Rock, not Steve Austin.
Ryback?s music plays and he comes to the ring . . . eventually.
Ryback circles Punk while Punk holds Ryback away with his crutches.
Heyman reminds Ryback that CM Punk is not medically cleared to compete.
Ryback says that Punk will be cleared. Ryback says that is why he has his sights set on the first Raw of the new year . . . when he becomes WWE Champion.
Match Number Four: Ryback versus Antonio Cesaro in a Non Title Match
Cesaro with a side head lock but Ryback with a shoulder tackle that sends Cesaro to the floor. Cesaro takes his time getting back into the ring and he connects with a shoulder and tries for a sunset flip but Ryback slams Cesaro?s head into the mat a few times while Ryback calls him stupid. Ryback sends Cesaro to the mat again.
Cesaro with a kick to the knee followed by a European uppercut and head butt. Ryback with a Thesz Press and a splash for a near fall. Cesaro goes to the floor again and Ryback tries to press Cesaro into the ring for the second straight night but Cesaro sends Ryback into the steps.
Ryback gets back into the ring and Cesaro gets a near fall. Cesaro with a chin lock using Ryback?s arm. Ryback with an arm drag but he misses a shoulder into the corner. Cesaro with a flying European uppercut for a near fall. Cesaro with a kick to the head and he stomps on the chest and gets another near fall.
Cesaro with a cravate. Ryback punches Cesaro but Cesaro with a kick but Ryback feels nothing. Ryback with a shoulder tackle out of the corner and he follows with a back body drop and spinebuster. Ryback sets for the lariat and he connects. Ryback says that it is over and he gets Cesaro up for the marching muscle buster and he hits it and gets the three count.
Winner: Ryback
We take a look at Miz getting ready to fly in an F-18. Tribute to the Troops will be tomorrow night.
AJ wishes Kaitlyn in the back and AJ wants to know what ?that look? was for. Kaitlyn isn?t sure. She tells AJ she does this over and over. This makes it hard to be her friend.
AJ starts to cry and Kaitlyn calls AJ a lunatic. They fight in the hallway.
Match Number Five: Eve Torres versus Kaitlyn in a Divas Title Match
Eve slams Kaitlyn?s head into the mat and she tosses Kaitlyn by the hair. Eve with a knee and bicycle kick. Eve takes Kaitlyn to the mat again and she gets a near fall. Eve gets a near fall. Eve sends Kaitlyn to the floor and she follows after Kaitlyn. Eve sends Kaitlyn into the apron. Eve gets a near fall.
Eve with an arm bar and chin lock. Kaitlyn with forearms but Eve with a flatline for a near fall. Eve with an arm bar and chin lock. Kaitlyn with an arm drag and rollup for a near fall. Kaitlyn with an inside cradle for a near fall.
Eve with an Irish whip but she runs into a boot. Kaitlyn with a sunset flip from the turnbuckles but she can only get a near fall. Kaitlyn with a slam and shoulder tackle for a near fall. Kaitlyn with an inverted DDT and she gets a near fall. Kaitlyn get Eve on her shoulders but Eve grabs the ropes. Kaitlyn with a jaw breaker and Eve falls to the floor. Kaitlyn with a dive onto Eve from the apron. Kaitlyn sends Eve into the announce table and then they return to the ring.
Kaitlyn goes up top but Eve grabs the referee?s leg. Kaityn grabs Eve by the leg and Kaitlyn forces the referee to fall. The referee calls for the bell.
Winner: Kaitlyn (by disqualification)
We go to the back and AJ says that Kaitlyn attacked her for no reason. Dolph says that Kaitlyn is jealous because she is with a future World Champion. Big Show tells Ziggler that his future will entail being in a body cast for Christmas if he pulls what he did last night.
Show tells Ziggler to cut the crap because they don?t trust each other. Show tells Ziggler to trust him. If he gets the inkling or premonition that Ziggler is going to try to screw him over, he will knock Ziggler so far into the future that his contract will have expired.
Josh, Michael, and John talk about the events that led to tonight?s main event and we see the footage from Raw.
Brad Maddox comes out and he says that nobody in the arena or watching at home will ever forget the name Brad Maddox after tonight. He will win his match and he will claim his contract and become a WWE Superstar.
Match Number Six: Brad Maddox versus Brodus Clay (with The Funkettes)
Brad wants the ref to check on the elbow pads and Brad tries to attack Clay but it does not work. Clay with a slam and head butts to the back. Clay with the sheeeplex. Clay with elbow drops while Booker and Teddy watch in Booker?s office.
Brad drops Clay across the ropes and then he hits a drop kick to the head and he gets a near fall. Maddox with elbows to the head. Clay with clotheslines followed by an Irish whip. Clay with a splash into the corner and then he hits the sheeeplex. Clay with the running head butt to the chest and he is going to call his momma and he hits the splash for the three count.
Winner: Brodus Clay
After the match, The Shield attacks Brodus Clay. Ambrose with elbows to the head. Ambrose and Rollins hold Clay up for the three man power bomb.
Dolph Ziggler (with AJ Lee and Big E Langston) and Big Show versus John Cena and Sheamus
Ziggler and Cena start things off and Ziggler avoids Cena and he struts. Cena with a punch and Ziggler tags in Show. Cena kicks and punches Show as he enters the ring but Show pushes him away. Show misses with the Shhhhh chop but Show with a spear. Show punches Cena in the midsection and then Ziggler punches Cena while the referee was not looking. Show gets between Cena and Sheamus to prevent the tag. Show with a head butt and then he does a jig for Sheamus.
Ziggler tags in and he hits a series of rapid fire elbow drops and ends with a delayed leaping elbow drop for a near fall. Ziggler with a neck breaker and then he applies a reverse chin lock. Cena with a back body drop. Show with an elbow drop to stop Cena from making the tag.
Show with an Irish whip and a splash into the corner. Ziggler tags in and misses a splash into the corner and Sheamus tags in. Sheamus with two running double sledges and then he sends Ziggler into the corner with a shoulder and hits a running knee lift. Sheamus with the ten forearms to the chest on the apron. Sheamus punches Show off the apron and then he tries for the Cloverleaf on Ziggler but Ziggler sends Sheamus to the floor.
Show with a clothesline to Sheamus on the floor. Show tags back in and he sends Sheamus back into the ring. Show with a chop to Sheamus. Show with punches to Sheamus in the corner and Ziggler gets in a kick to the head.
Sheamus with punches but Show with a punch to the midsection. Sheamus with punches but Show with a knee to the head. Show with an arm bar. Sheamus with punches but Show with a shoulder tackle. Ziggler tags in and he gets a near fall. Ziggler punches Sheamus but Sheamus punches back. Ziggler with a kick to the knee and he hits a Fameasser and gets a near fall.
Show tags back in and he punches Sheamus. Show sends Sheamus to the mat with a driving elbow drop and gets a near fall. Show grabs Sheamus for a choke slam but Sheamus counters with a DDT and both men are down. Ziggler tags in and so does Cena. Cena with two flying shoulder tackles followed by the Blue Thunder Bomb. Cena sets for the Five Knuckle Shuffle and he connects. Cena gets Ziggler up for the Attitude Adjustment but Show punches Cena.
Sheamus clotheslines Show over the top rope to the floor and both men are down. Show and Sheamus fight up the ramp. Ziggler escapes Attitude Adjustment and hits the Zig Zag but Cena kicks out. Ziggler argues with the referee and Cena hits the Attitude Adjustment. Langston with a body block and the referee calls for the bell.
Winners: Sheamus and John Cena (by disqualification)
After the match, Langston hits the Big Ending and stands over Cena while AJ plays ring around the Langston. AJ checks on Ziggler and she kisses him.
We go to credits.
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